Well, I have to say I wish I did NOT have blog material to write. Before I get into the current event, for those of you who are not aware of my being “directionally challenged”, I must preface this with I can get lost with a Garmin. If you would like a story on this subject refer to the blog- I am so directionally challenged.
Well, this evening Michael was taking Timmy to weigh-in for his wrestling tournament, and he offered to pick up one of Timmy’s wrestling buddies who was on the way and save some fellow parents a trip. So, before he left I told him how to get there. He questioned me, as if I had trouble with directions before, and I said to him, “I KNOW what I am talking about. I have been there. I am the taxi service around here ya know.” So with his fate in my hands he left. Meanwhile Jess and Jake stopped by for dinner so we could all hang out when Michael returned. About 15 minutes after Michael left, Jake found Michael’s phone on the couch. And about 30 minutes after that I received a call from a number I didn’t recognize only to hear Michael’s voice on the other end. He couldn’t find their house. At this time I am thinking, “seriously, it is not that hard, there are only about 5 houses on the whole street” This was odd to me because Michael is not one who gets lost, that is my role, so I just figured it was because it was dark out and he couldn’t see well. I told him I would call and have them flash their porch lights to signal him. About 20 minutes later our friends called me back saying there was still know sign of Michael. And all of a sudden I had this feeling that “Tucker” might not be the name of their road. “Oh no” I said “What is the name of your road?” I asked hoping to hear the word Tucker, knowing I wouldn’t. Sure enough I sent Michael to the wrong road and he was without his cell phone. Oh my gosh, my stomach just churned, how was I going to let Michael know he would NEVER find the right house on the road he was going up and down who knows how many times. And not to mention, I would never live this down. Our friend said he would go around the block and look for him and then just head in to weigh-ins before they closed, he thought Michael probably gave up and saw that he better get to Leslie also. Well, 10 minutes later I got a call from our friend’s wife. She informed me Michael was not on Tucker and she would let me know if her husband saw him in Leslie. Oh my gosh, I was feeling sooooo bad. I had sent my husband on a wild goose chase; sad thing is this wasn’t the first time. There had been many. One in particular I can remember was when Josh was 3 months old. He had a special $20 bottle that he had to use because he had trouble eating as a baby. I thought I left it at the Eaton Rapids football game, so freaking out about the 20-dollar bottle; I had Michael drive back into town to retrieve it. He had to jump the fence only to call me saying he couldn’t find it. “Are you sure you didn’t put it in the diaper bag.” He asked. “No, I AM sure.” I said as I went to double check, and THERE IT WAS! So today when I thought of my poor husband wandering a street I had sent him to, I just wanted to cry. I felt so helpless and guilty I just couldn’t sit there and wait, I looked at Jess and Jake and said I was going to look for him. I grabbed my keys and headed out the door. Thinking back, I wonder what I expected to accomplish. There was no way he stayed on that same road for another half an hour. But logic wasn’t winning in my head. I started my van, put it in reverse and backed up, until I heard that horrible sound of metal hitting metal. “oh no” I thought. ‘please tell me I did not just back into someone.” Ya see, backing into another vehicle is a sound I am unfortunately very familiar with. In the past ten years I have backed into my sister’s vehicle twice, my mom’s once and I also ran into someone’s mail box backing out of their driveway. So yeah, reverse is not my best direction. Michael says I need a bumper sticker that reads, “Do not park behind me, you WILL get hit.” Needless to say, I jumped out of my van and saw my sister’s beautiful red traverse behind me, which until now I had managed NOT to back into despite my reputation with her old car. And keep in mind; this was now the THIRD time I had backed into one of my sister’s vehicles. I didn’t even go to check the damages; I just started crying and went back in the house. I couldn’t even talk when I came back in the door. My family rushed to me asking over and over again “what’s wrong?” My sister said jokingly “What, did you hit my car?” Through my tears I just nodded my head. “Oh, I’m kidding” she said. My mom, picking up on the fact that I wasn’t kidding, she asked, “Did you hit her car?” Still sobbing I nodded again. “What, she is serious!” my sister said with laughter at the irony and yet panic in her voice. So I just sank into the floor crying. I sent my husband to a non-existent address, I crashed my sister’s car, and I still didn’t know where Michael was or when he would be home. I told everyone to go home, I just wanted to climb in my bed and shut down. Well, they stayed with me, of course, until Michael did return. He walked through the door and with tear stained cheeks I sheepishly looked at him. “Lucy” he said with his best “Ricky Ricardo” accent, “You have some splainin to do!” It was after this comment Jake(my brother-in-law), muttered under his breath. “he doesn’t know half the “splainin” she has to do.” So yeah, I “splained” everything to Michael. And fortunately the look he gave me was the one I see so often, and that is his loving accepting grin, with a headshake. That poor man I have put him through so much and yet he just couldn’t live without me. It was then that I informed him of the lesson we all could learn from today and that is “Don’t leave home without your cell phone.”