Monday, November 19, 2012

Uncle Lyle's Great, Side walk ESCAPE!

They say Age can take the “young” outta of the “wild boy” but it doesn’t take the “wild boy” outta the “old man.” Well, that’s what I say anyway, especially after accompanying my Uncle Lyle on quite the adventure today. Well, I guess technically he is Michael’s uncle, but from the very first day I met him, Uncle Lyle has made me feel like I was as much his niece as his actual nieces. So anyway, my Uncle Lyle is in the hospital expected to have surgery. He’s had a rough couple of days processing what I will just say is “bad news.” Michael and I went to visit him today in the hospital. We walked in the room just in time to hear him telling a nurse that he was going to have a cigarette. Well, I guess according to policy they didn’t want him outside just in case something happened, such as a “slip and fall” I guess. I thought it funny that the cigarette wasn’t as much of a concern. While Uncle Lyle was trying his darndest to plead his case, his son ask for a moment to take care of some paper work, so Michael and I went to wait in the family waiting room around the corner. Moments later we see Uncle Lyle and his old high school buddy walking down the hall. “Well, Uncle Lyle is making an escape.” Michael said. As we caught up to them his friend informed us the nurse approved Uncle Lyle walking the halls, and yet some how Uncle Lyle had managed his way to the elevators. “Hey.” Uncle Lyle said beckoning his friend. “Push the button.” All 3 of us stammered trying to figure out how to talk this man on a mission, out of the mission. Seeing that he was getting no-where with any of us, he lifted up his cane, held it out and pushed the button himself with the bottom of his cane. Then on the elevator, while us 3 accomplices were still afraid to push the buttons and truly commit to what was happening, he did it again. I just thought it was the funniest thing to watch him push buttons with his cane. All the while arguing with his friend who was still trying to talk him out of this excursion. It was like a scene straight out of grumpy old men. As the doors closed to the elevator we saw a nurse heading our way, when she passed us by we all let out a sigh of relief. “Whew, I thought we were caught.” You gotta know, I was always the good kid in school, never breaking the rules, and now I was looking over my shoulder to see if I was gonna have to take out hospital security while my Uncle made his escape! I did Taeboe for awhile, I might be able to give Uncle Lyle a 3 second head start. We successfully made our way to the lobby and Michael commandeered a wheel chair so Uncle Lyle could sit. I thought to myself, “It’s a good thing that wheel chair isn’t an electric one, I would bet Uncle Lyle woulda peeled outta there leaving rubber marks on the floor, drag racing down the Ave like the good ole days. So we push him outside and by now I am just laughing at the whole situation. Just watching us try to act natural, nervous to find security coming after us around every corner. And watching Uncle Lyle with his friend sneaking off to have a cigarette as if they were in high school sneaking off behind the bleachers, oh my gosh, that’s when I realized, “AGE can take the YOUNG out of the WILD BOY, but it can’t take the WILD BOY outta the OLD MAN.” So there we were pushing a hospital fugitive further and further from the hospital, because the ironic part of the story is although Uncle Lyle was very willing to break hospital regulations, he was determined to smoke on the city side walk because you can’t smoke on hospital grounds. We finally got him to the street and just began to laugh. There we were on a street corner with Uncle Lyle smoking a cigarette while sitting in a wheel chair that had a flag on it with the name of the “escaped” hospital, basically saying “we aren’t supposed to be here!!!!!” Two cigarettes later we headed back toward the building, just before we got to hospital property Uncle Lyle put the break on his wheel chair. “One more.” His friend really wanted to get him back to the room before they put out an APB on us, but Uncle Lyle was pretty determined to have just one more smoke. So after seemingly reenacting another scene from grumpy old men, his friend consented and he lit up one more. As he was soaking up his last few minutes of freedom we saw a nurse headed our way. It seemed we are busted. “They are looking all over for you, case worker and all. You better get back up there.” She scolded. She left us and Uncle Lyle finished his last smoke. On our way back to the room, as busted as we were, I think we all felt a little victorious too. Uncle Lyle had been through a lot in the last couple of days, and it was fun accompanying him on his “wild boy adventure” today. On the ride back up the elevator, Uncle Lyle said, “Well…time to face the music.” After he was settled back in his room, his nurse, the one who caught us, took his blood pressure and temp. When the temp registered just a touch low uncle Lyle ask the nurse, “close enough, right?” And she said, “Yeah, that’s acceptable, it is a little cold outside.” “It’s cold out, you gotta window open or something.” Uncle Lyle responded with a mischievous tone. I was laughing but the nurse seemed less amused. Uncle Lyle just grinned. When Uncle Lyle’s friend said good-bye to him tonight, Uncle Lyle shook his hand and with a heart of gratitude and feelings of companionship, he said “thank you” to his dear friend. It was a sweet moment of comradery between the “grumpy old men.”

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