Reflecting on today, makes me laugh!

Reflecting on today makes me laugh. I took the kids to the beach today and I can still smile just thinking about watching them all playing. I especially chuckle when I replay the time Timmy was just running down the beach shore with his swim shorts drooping, as they tend to do, with his little buns just starting to peak out. To be honest I am surprised they are still white considering the amount of time I have seen them in the sun this summer.

Today was great. I lay on a sheet till my hearts content, then I went for a swim with the kids. After a while, I ended up in the shallow area with Timmy and Bo. We were scuffing our feet in the dirt, in the shallow part of the water, and then watching it billow out under the water. It was crazy. It looked like we were witnessing an explosion from miles away. So we went up and down the shore kicking the dirt leaving a trail of “smoke” under the water. Eventually, we ended up having a water fight. Once I was done with that I headed back to my sheet and thought, “I bet playing in the water with your kids adds years to your life. It just felt great to play in the water and watch them laugh. I just love summer and I am doing my best to soak up the last moment we have of it.

I am human, and that's ok.

Well today was what I call a very “human” day. Yes, in all realty I know I am human, as do we all. Yet, we all work so hard to pretend we are not. I myself like to try to be wonder women. I find myself striving to be the mom that has it all together. The mom that doesn’t forget lunches, fieldtrips, or appointments. The mom that is early and arrives with each kid showered with no dirt under the fingernails. But I am NOT wonder women, and forgetting a lunch or burning dinner I can get over. The human part of me that I have to work harder at forgiving is when I come up short emotionally for my kids.

Today I was cranky with the kids. I was irritated over chores left undone, and snapped at them for toys left out. When they didn’t listen I responded very short and irritated. I could feel the “cranky” energy just oozing off of me and it was not pretty. Bo had decided to quit being potty trained today and I was not shy about showing my disappointment. Each time I would get irritated and upset I felt justified because THEY, were not listening and had been told a million times.

But at the end of the day I feel remorse. I was wishing I had been more patient. More like the “kid” whisperer. Because at the end of the day nothing matters anymore. Just that they know I love them and I am proud of everything they are learning.

It is at this point in time that I have a choice to make. I can either feel guilty for all my shortcomings as a parent or I can learn from my mistakes, lay my head down for the night and start all over again tomorrow. Cause frankly I am a dang good mom. I love my kids so much to think of them creates a lump in my throat and a pang in my heart. And it is moments like these the very best I can be for them is “human.” To be a mom who bleeds and knows how to say I am sorry. To be a mom who despite all my shortcoming is determined as heck to do my very best. To be a mom who may get knocked down, but pulls herself back to her feet and keep moving forward.

It is times like these I humble myself before my creator and thank him for all he has given me and all he teaches me everyday. And one thing I know for sure is, if I am going through a trial, I must be learning.

So to all you parents trying to be super heroes, or maybe you are in a state of beating yourself up for you shortcomings, life is to short to spend so much time not accepting our humanity.

She had a baby, of course?

Well, I have had a few people ask me how the “she is having a baby” story ends. Well, she had a baby of course. Haha. There is definitely a lot more to the story, I just have been to busy holding the baby to write it. Haha. I did make it to the truck before she delivered. She insisted on walking in to help the contractions keep the baby moving down. So we had to stop 4 times from the tuck to the hospital entrance so she could breath through contractions. I found my self chuckling at the thought of the security guard on duty, just sitting up there watching parking ramp videos. That had to be an entertaining sight. We had to stop another 3 times from the entrance to the elevators to take us to the 3rd floor. People kept trying to give her wheel chairs. She tried sitting in one but said it was more painful to sit then to stand. So after that she just kept turning them down. Finally, we were steps away from the elevator and we were stopped again as she leaned into Jake doing her breathing pattern through another contraction. One of the hospital staff came and was talking to us about getting her a wheel chair. She again declined and he said, “Is her back hurting her?” I said, “She is having a baby.” Then I felt really stupid for stating the obvious until he said “Right now?” So to be honest I’m not sure if he was being smart with me for stating the obvious, or if he just really didn’t get it. Anyway, as I am trying to talk to him about the situation, Jess, still having a contraction utters a “Shhhhhhh.” So I was quiet, but this guy kept talking about wheel chairs and elevators and such. Getting seriously irritated Jess finally just says right out loud “Shut up!” I could hardly keep from laughing. Seeing that he kept talking I don’t think he got that either. We finally got her on to the elevator where we had to explain to another “man” with a wheel chair why she didn’t want to sit in it. Just as the doors were about to open she had another contraction so their we were holding the elevator doors open so the elevator wouldn’t take us back down, yet she couldn’t exactly move at that point in time either. So the “man” on the elevator hollers out, “We need a stretcher, NOW!” My sister just rolled her eyes. If everyone would just leave her alone during the contraction she would be ok. But still, it was quite funny. By the time she checked in she was at a 7 and delivered the fat chunky sumo wrestler 2½ hours later. He was purple and fat!!!!

She's having a baby!

“She said that you need to get here NOW!” Jake said to me over the phone. I was on my way to a family reunion and my sister was apparently on her way to the hospital. She called me that morning saying she was starting to have contractions again and that she would keep me posted. She had been having contractions on and off for three weeks now, and we just got used to going on with our day, because they usually quit after a couple of hours. Well, this time they were real and she said, “Get here now!” They were van shopping in preparation for their new arrival, and when her contractions kept getting stronger and closer together they decide to go near by the hospital. On my way, my 30 minute drive to the hospital, she called me 3 times asking how far I was, and was asking me if she should just check in. I told her it was up to her and I would find her when I got there. I hung up the phone and said to my mom, “You better speed. We will just tell the cop that we are having a baby!” Never mind she wasn’t even en in the car with us.

Finally, we arrived at the hospital. My mom dropped me off out front and then went to park. She let me off at the patient pick up and I couldn’t get in. So I ran down to the other doors asking what floor labor and delivery was on.

As I was running down the hall to the elevators I called Jake and asked, “Where are you?” “Two D.” He responded. “OK, I am on my way.” I said. Then I hung up and dashed in an elevator. As I stepped off on the 3rd floor nothing looked familiar and it said intensive care or something I can’t remember, but it certainly wasn’t Labor and Delivery. I found a nurse and told her I was lost. She said I was definitely in the wrong area. She took me down a hallway you could only cross if you had a key card, and got me to Labor and Delivery. I was then frantically looking for room two D. The nurses asked me if they could help me find something. I told them I needed to find room Two D. “We don’t have a room two D.” they said with a puzzled tone. “Oh, well my sister is having a baby. Oh well of course she is having a baby, that is why I am standing here.” I babbled frantically. “OK what is her name?” they asked. “Right, right her name. That would help. It is Warren.” I replied. They all looked at each other very confused as they search the computer. “Jessica Warren.” I clarified. “WE don’t have any Warrens here.” For a moment I thought I went to the wrong hospital and then I remembered that they never told me if they checked in or not. “Oh, the parking garage ramp. They are still in the parking garage.” “I will be right back with her,” I said running back out the doors. I am surprised they didn’t call security and send the psych ward after me. I ran out the doors and saw the hall I came in on realized I could not go back the way I came without a nurse. So I headed for the elevators asking the people going down if they new how to get to the parking ramp. They did so I followed them out hoping she didn’t hatch the kid before I found her. Seriously, this was turning into a sitcom just waiting to air. I could see this on Seinfield or something. haha

Value Based Parenting pays off, yeah!!!

Isn’t it great when you see your kids implement what you have been trying so hard to teach them. Sometimes I seriously wonder if they even here me when I talk. Cause no matter how many times I say “Don’t leave your toothbrush on the counter, and put your dirty clothes IN the dirty clothes basket” I still find this items left out.

Well, I really like the value based parenting methods, which it’s probably good that I like them seeing that I teach them. Haha. But seriously part of the value-based parenting concepts is teaching your kids to learn to govern themselves. If you teach your child to govern himself and learn to listen to his/her own discernment, then when you aren’t around they are more likely to make wise choices on their own because they believe in them, not for fear of getting in “trouble.” The idea is helping your child see who HE/SHE wants to be and making their choices accordingly, teaching them to feel their heart and listen to the truth in their OWN discernment.

So as my kids have been getting older and more independent I have been talking to them about being aware of safety. I have been encouraging them to always listen to their heart in situations they are in. If they are somewhere with friends, or at school, or even at a friends house and they get the feeling that they aren’t safe, then they need to trust their guts and get out of the situation. And at that point it isn’t about being right or wrong, it is about trusting your own discernment and learning to follow it.

Well we were at a school playground the other day and Jess and I decided to walk the little boys over to another playground across the street and across a softball field. My older kids wanted to stay where we were. They asked if they could stay on their own. I told them no because there were people here I didn’t know. Actually, there was one teenager there shooting hoops. But he gave me a feeling that wasn’t safe, so I too had to listen to my own discernment and take my kids with me. I didn’t tell them he didn’t feel safe I didn’t want the guy to here me. They didn’t ask later so I didn’t bring it up.

After playing on the church playground for a while my kids came back up to me and said “Look, mom there is no one down there now, can we go?” I knew we were only going to stay 10 more minutes so I told them to stick together and go ahead. When they were about halfway there I noticed the teenager was back shooting hoops again. So I kept my eye out figuring I would just cut the trip even shorter. But just as my kids reached the road by the playground they turned around and headed back.

When they arrived back I asked why they changed their mind. “We just got a funny feeling, like it wasn’t safe.” Josh responded, “Ya, I felt it to and agreed with Josh.” Kate chimed in. “Oh” I replied, “Was it those boys riding down the street on their bikes?” I was trying to fish out the details of exactly what they felt. “No, it was that guy down their playing basketball.” Said Josh. “Yeah, we saw him before we left the first time and he looked and me and his eyes looked mean. So we decided to come back.” I told them that was very responsible and then I asked the question to bring the whole experience home for them which was, “How did it feel when you listened and trusted your heart?” “Really good.” They responded. It is great to help your kids tune into how things feel for them. Obviously there is much more to this technique than I can put in this post, but there are some pieces for ya.

Anyway, I was excited to see them being responsible and tuning into their own discernment. I am not always going to be there to tell them when they are safe or not. So I am glad to see they are learning what I am teaching them!

What color is your shower?

Well today I mopped my floor and cleaned my bathtub! Yeah. It is about time. I just had to enjoy the sparkle after I was done, cause it doesn’t last long and who knows when I will get to it again. I am not even going to tell you how long it was since I mopped it last because that is just too incriminating. Speaking of incriminating. My shower!!!! I scrubbed it for 10 minutes with some stuff that is supposed to help remove the iron, and when I rinsed it out it looked like I hadn’t cleaned it in 2 weeks. Granted looking two weeks old is a heck of a lot better than looking 2 months old, but not when I just cleaned it 15 minutes ago. So I waited till that evening and tried one last time. Finally, it was restored to its original color, which I had forgotten it was actually white and not a dark taupe with a hint of rusty orange. My fans however are still not done. I said I was going to do them as “spring cleaning” and it is now almost fall. Ugh. Well, at least I won’t catch some nasty disease just by taking a shower anymore. And as for my floor, we shall see how long it lasts.

Don't plan to accomplish too much.

Don't make plans to accomplish too much. If the kids get wind of it they will put a stop to such crazy notions. Today I dropped my older three off to farm camp and really wanted to get some writing work done. So I thought I would pick up my nephew, Ayden (2) and take the kids to the little fenced in playground in town. I was just going to take Bo, but I thought he might last longer with a friend to play with, and I had a lot to get done. So I drove out and grabbed Ayden and then back to Springport to the park. I spread out my sheet in the grass and got all situated with my notebook. After about 20 minutes Ayden came to inform me he would like to go bye, bye. I replied both enthusiastically and desperately, “No, we aren’t leaving yet, go play with Bo. Go and have some fun on the slide.” And off he went so back to work I went. But then five minutes later there he was whining to me, “Go bye, bye.” Again I turned down his request to leave the “fun” playground and went back to work. Finally, after we had been at the playground for a total of about 30 minutes he was back at my sheet standing there looking down at me with big giant crocodile tears saying “Bye, bye. Want to go bye, bye.” So I looked over at Bo, who was playing contently by himself in the sand and asked him if he wanted to go to Aunt Jessie’s house. His first reply was no, but with some coercing he finally agreed to leave the playground. Seriously, I picked up a friend for my kid to play with at the playground and ended up having to talk my own kid into leaving cause his little buddy didn’t want to stay. Oh the irony of things. Parent choices are most times a big gamble it seems. Win some lose some.

Ahhhhhhhhh! Gotta go Potty!!!!

“Poopy on the potty! Poopy on the potty!” Bo came running down the hall for the 3rd time in the past 20 minutes. So I scooped him up and headed for the toilet and just like the past 2 times, nothing happened. As some of you may know we have been working on potty training our LAST baby. He has actually been easier than my other 3 were. He has just been struggling a bit with #2. He comes in saying, “Poopy on the potty” while grabbing his buns. So I run to the potty with him and he sits there for 3 seconds and says “Nope, all gone.” He then insists on getting off the toilet. For those of you who know Bo, he puts the most stubborn kid to shame. I have tried to get him to sit there and wait. I’ve pleaded, bribed, threatened and begged. I have tried to reason with him, explaining to him the science of the intestines and digestive system trying to explain it takes a minute to accomplish # 2. But no matter how I put it he insists on hopping off that toilet. Finally, the 4th time he comes running down the hall you can hear the panic in his voice. “Ahhhhhhhh! Poopy on the potty! Poopy on the potty!” he is now shrieking. So once again I rush him to the toilet. Finally there is success and his response is “Oh, there it is.”

Who said??!!

Who got to sit in their big giant chair and deicide what is acceptable and what is not. What is cool and what is uncool. Who said pimples and braces aren’t the bomb. Seriously, braces cost as much as a big beautiful diamond, and then some, that should count for something, right? Who said women have to have smoothe legs but if a man doesn’t have enough hair on his legs then he’s not man enough. Seriously, who got to make those decisions, cause I would like to give the person who invented “starch” a piece of my mind. Michael grabbed out a shirt to wear the other night and it was wrinkly. You see I gave up ironing about 11 years ago when my son was born. LOL Don’tcha just love how if I say, “I gave up” it sounds almost heroic. Like “Um yeah, when my son was born I decided to give up my wild side and settle down, so I gave up ironing the day he was born and haven’t ironed a drop since.” Yeah, I think I will stick with that version, it sounds better. The thing is when you think about it, how come wrinkled isn’t in. Some shirts come pre wrinkled! I actually love them. I can wad them up, throw them in a suit case and pull it out when I get to my destination and look just fine. So why aren’t wrinkled work shirts, or wrinkled cotton shirts just as acceptable. It’s just crazy. If you buy it wrinkled you can’t wear it pressed, but if you buy it pressed you can’t wear it wrinkled. Seriously, if the first person didn’t decide to iron we would never no the difference and housewives wouldn’t have the “ironing pile.”(Which I don’t have any more anyway cause I “gave that up along time ago” remember.) My method is put all my hang-ups in two loads, one dark and one light. Then I pull them out as soon as the dryer is done and hang them up. If I don’t get to the dryer quick enough, seeing that I have four kids, one of which is “Bo”, well to get that “ironedish” look I just toss the really bad ones back in the washer hoping to do better next time. Haha We do have a couple of shirts that just plain ‘require” ironing, according to “society” so I do break down and iron those when needed. Or sometimes if an item that just didn’t quite come out of the dryer somewhat “permanent pressed” I will quickly do it. I think I might just decide to start a new trend; it would be so much easier. First it’s no ironing then maybe I will quit shaving my legs. LOL

Do you have the keys?

Do you ever try to cram too much in one day! I seem to be doing that a lot this summer, but today was especially full. First it began with a harmless trip to Meijer. I picked Jess up cause her car is not working and she needed food. Then we got a call from Chris saying her and Brock were headed to the play land in Charlotte, and invited us to join them. So off we went for lunch. Things were still running quite smooth at this point in time, until we thought we could hit the lake for some tubing. It was now 1:15 in the afternoon and I had to pick Josh of from day camp at 3:00, and pick Kate up from a friend’s house at 3:30 and I had a 4:00 phone appointment. We figured if we were on the boat by 1:45 that would give us an hour. So we hopped in our cars and drove home. We frantically put on bathing suits, loaded life jackets and tubes and headed to the dock. On my way down I got a hold of my mom who said she could pick Josh up at 3:00, and I called the parents of Kate’s friend and they said I could pick her up later also. So, we now could tube unit 3:30 before I had to head back for my 4:00 appointment. I stopped and picked up Chris and Brock who were looking for spare swim suits at Skip and Karen’s (across from the dock) since this was a spur of the moment plan. Finally; we all pile out and head to the boat. We got the cover off, and got everyone’s life jackets on. I ran back to the van to grab some water to have on board while Chris finished getting the boat ready. As I am heading back to the dock she asked me “Do you have Keys?” “Oh yes”, I replied, “they are in the van” So I ran back to the van to grab the keys out of the glove box, only when I got there they were not in the box. I went back and told Chris we would have to call Michael. I dialed his number and asked him where the keys were. He said, “At home on top of your jewelry box, and Jake's keys are here at work.” So Chris and I packed up the now “sweaty” kids and decided to jump in Skip and Karen’s pool to cool off. Crazy, we had everything all worked out to cram it all in, only to end up with no keys!!!!! I would like to say I went home and hung out for the evening but after I rushed myself to my 4:00 appointment, once I finished up I headed to get Kate. I stopped at the gas station to pick up rice to take to Jess’ house for dinner. Once we got to my sister’s house we all grabbed our swim suits and headed to the boat. We spent the evening tubing and ended up eating dinner at 9:00. It is now 10:30 and they are all finally tucked away in bed. Whew! What a great day.

On the road and your baby due when?

I recently planned a trip to Columbus, Ohio to see my 2nd family. I usually try to make it down there a couple times a summer but this summer has been so busy the kids had to remind me to plan the trip. So now I was trying to squeeze it in before Jess had her baby. For some time now, whenever we could, my is and I would make these adventures together. This time I tried to keep it low key. I told her when I was going but offered no invitation. I figured she would pass seeing that she was 9 months pregnant. I would like to say I was concerned for her, and didn’t want her to travel while she was so far along, but this was not the case. More than anything I didn’t want to be stuck in a minivan with 5 kids and a 9 months along, pregnant woman. But the day before the trip I realized it was the last time we would be able to make the trip together in one vehicle. Once she had this baby, we would be driving separately. So the day I was going to leave I called her and said, “let’s just go. Let’s just pack up and go together.” She, very much aware of why I didn’t invite her earlier, replied, “Do you feel sorry for me, or do you really want me to come.” I explained to her my sentimental reasoning and she too realized that this was our last hurrah! And what better way to do it than this crazy scenario. It was 9:00a.m. when we decided to go, and neither of us had packed a single item of clothing, never mind the fact that I had to pack up four kids and she needed to do laundry! We had to be out the door by 1:00 cause that is when Ayden was going to get cranky for a nap. After running around like a crazy lady packing for me and everyone else, also trying to clean the house up since I was too tired to do it the night before. When I looked at my messy house the night before, at that time I didn’t think I was going to make it out of town, cause ya see, the plot thickens. Not only was my sister 9 months pregnant but she had been having pre-labor contractions all week, and the day before we made this crazy decision, she was having them so bad she was sure she was going to the hospital, and then out of no where they stopped again. Yet, here we were the very next day piling ourselves in the car for a four hour journey. When I arrived at her house to pick her up, only 20 minutes behind( I was very impressed with myself, considering my house looked pretty good too) she looked at me and said, “Everyone I talk to thinks I am crazy” She was looking to me to absolved her concern. But I just looked and her and said “Yup, we are totally crazy! But, this is what we do.” She couldn’t deny it. We do find ourselves in many scenarios when we look at each other and say, “what were we thinking?” But we somehow manage to keep the craziness going, it is just what we do! So on the road we went……

Jake the Great

Well today I just have to write a tribute to my Bro in-law. Today my kids were experimenting with “knee boarding”. Well, one of the times around the lake Kate went down but she stayed attached to the board. The board flipped her upside down and she was gasping for air. Michael was on shore at this point in time so Jake had to dive in and help her out. It was between him and my 9 month pregnant sister, so he won the coin toss. He dove in and rescued the panic stricken, flailing little girl without a second thought.

My brother in law is the greatest uncle ever. He is an oversized kid so he’s lot of fun. The first time he flew out to meet us, my sister and I went down stairs where he was playing with the kids. When we walked into the room he was sitting in the floor shooting hoops with Josh(age 6) with the plastic basket ball, all while wearing high heels on his big toe and Kate (age 4) was brushing his hair. It was at this point in time I thought he might be a keeper. Another one of his attributes is he is always so aware of what is going on and I know my kids are safe with him. He that uncle who is making sure pan handles are not hanging over the stove, and making sure there aren’t going to get smashed fingers or heads. The other day while on the boat Kate was standing on the buoy. He told her to get off it. I figured she might break it. He followed his statement up with “if you lose your balance you will hit your head on the windshield.” Hmmmm. I did not even think of that.

He so cute. I must say I am so glad my sister married him. He is a good husband, dad, uncle and Bother in-law. He even watches out for me, especially if Michael isn’t there. I am so grateful he is in our family. He is the greatest.